Supposably.
Irregardless.
I could care less.
Expresso.
For all intensive purposes.
Have you ever said any of these? And was it so many years before you knew you were saying it wrong that it ended up feeling somewhat natural to say it incorrectly going forward?
If you are nodding yes (but hoping no one will see), know that you are NOT alone in this. We’ve probably all been guilty of mispronouncing one or more of these at some point in our lives. Me included! I’ll admit it.
When I was much younger, my sister worked at a coffee shop right before Starbucks made it big. I was getting pretty deep into the coffee scene and I definitely said “expresso” before being shamefully and embarrassingly corrected by all those knowledgeable connoisseurs.
And I know once in a while I still let a “I could care less” slip out before I think about it and catch myself. I can always tell something sounds off, but with my mouth working faster than my brain, it usually slips out before I can stop it. As an editor, it’s not my most shining moment to SPEAK a misnomer like this.
But, heck, we’re all human—we make mistakes! There’s no need to go hide in the nearest cave, never to return to civilization! (Unless you’re into that sort of thing, of course.) Instead, let’s learn from those mistakes and have a little fun in the process, shall we?
The purpose of my lesson today is not to deliver the right answers for these common misnomers (although, because I can’t NOT, they are all listed at the end of this post!). Rather, we need to talk about whether, why, and how to use them to illustrate an important point for writing purposes.
So here’s that important point. Ready?
THE POINT: Just because we say (or have said) them incorrectly sometimes doesn’t mean we must use them correctly in our writing.
Yes, friend. I just told you to embrace the mistake! I know, it’s confusing! The editor part of my brain wants to be confused too, so let’s clear this up!
Why on Earth would a book writing coach tell you to use something as ridiculous as the word “irregardless” in your writing? This word in particular is simply blasphemous to me. (Even more so now that it’s considered to be an actual word that is IN the dictionary, “supposably.” What the heck, Merriam-Webster?! I trusted you!)
Okay, so you called my bluff. I really don’t want you to write a book with a bunch of dumb mistakes in it. But I do want you to think about whether you should.
Consider this:
If your book spans a period of time within which you were perhaps younger or not aware that you said the wrong thing, I definitely don’t want your much wiser current self to edit your younger, less wise self and insert the correct word instead of what was actually said.
Why? Authenticity, that’s why.
And keep in mind that this mainly applies to dialogue. You never need to correct your spoken errors! In fact, if and when they are relevant, leave them for all of us to embrace and enjoy. This is what makes you YOU. This is what makes you human. And this is what helps us connect to you as a writer who writes about real things for the real world.
Okay, fine, Danielle, I get it! You want me to be REAL and leave all my dumb mistakes. But doesn’t this just make for a messy, confusing book?
Wow, you are sharp! This is an excellent question! The answer: yes, and no.
Let’s break this down.
Yes, of course your mispronunciation or misuse of certain words or phrases might throw off your readers. But only if you do it without clueing them in. The key here: acknowledgement.
(And this is where the “no” part of my answer comes in to save the day!)
For non-dialogue, the fix is quite simple. You just come right out and acknowledge it. Here’s an example.
Mom was always harping on me to clean my room. She tried all sorts of tactics, but nothing stuck. I was just lazy and couldn’t be bothered. Until one day, I came flying out of my room holding a plate swarming with ants that had somehow sniffed out the discarded pizza crusts from the previous week and then told all their friends. Gross.
As luck would have it, Mom was in the kitchen, poised and ready with the “I told you so.” And she had told me so, “supposably.” She hated when I said that word—it was my best retort because it drove her completely nuts.
“Danielle, how many times do I have to tell you it’s ‘supposedly.’ Stop saying that! You know that makes me cringe!”
Yes, Mother, I do know that, I thought to myself as I attempted to de-ant the plate and my arm while suppressing an evil giggle.
[And then later, you can use the word “supposably” again as a callback to this moment, making it something of an inside joke for the readers to join you in. How fun, right?]
THE POINT: So, with that example, let me get to my ultimate point. (Yes, I have one!)
I think we can all agree that these words are incorrect and you should try to avoid them in your writing at all cost. UNLESS they belong in your story because they are true and authentically aligned with what really happened. In this case, make it obvious for your readers so they know you’re not just making a forehead-slapping mistake.
So, when you go back and revise your draft, look for places where you’ve potentially adjusted some of this language to avoid the mistake. See if you can include it but make it clear that you’ve intentionally done this. It will add some flavor and personality into your writing, and your readers will like seeing that side of you. I promise!
And for those of you who read all the way to the end, here is your prize—the correct answers!
Supposedly.
Regardless.
I couldn’t care less.
Espresso.
For all intents and purposes.
Creatively yours,
